阅读阁【yueduge.cc】第一时间更新《雾都孤儿（中英文对照）》最新章节。
OLIVER，BEINGOFFEREDANOTHERPLACE，MAKESHISFIRSTENTRYINTOPUBLICLIFE
Ingreatfamilies，whenanadvantageousplacecannotbeobtained，eitherinpossession，reversion，remainder，orexpectancy，fortheyoungmanwhoisgrowingup，itisaverygeneralcustomtosendhimtosea。Theboard，inimitationofsowiseandsalutaryanexample，tookcounseltogetherontheexpediencyofshippingoffOliverTwist，insomesmalltradingvesselboundtoagoodunhealthyport。Thissuggesteditselfastheverybestthingthatcouldpossiblybedonewithhim：theprobabilitybeing，thattheskipperwouldfloghimtodeath，inaplayfulmood，somedayafterdinner，orwouldknockhisbrainsoutwithanironbar；bothpastimesbeing，asisprettygenerallyknown，veryfavouriteandcommonrecreationsamonggentlemanofthatclass。Themorethecasepresenteditselftotheboard，inthispointofview，themoremanifoldtheadvantagesofthestepappeared；so，theycametotheconclusionthattheonlywayofprovidingforOlivereffectually，wastosendhimtoseawithoutdelay。
Mr。Bumblehadbeendespatchedtomakevariouspreliminaryinquiries，withtheviewoffindingoutsomecaptainorotherwhowantedacabin-boywithoutanyfriends；andwasreturningtotheworkhousetocommunicatetheresultofhismission；whenheencounteredatthegate，nolessapersonthanMr。Sowerberry，theparochialundertaker。
Mr。Sowerberrywasatallgaunt，large-jointedman，attiredinasuitofthreadbareblack，withdarnedcottonstockingsofthesamecolour，andshoestoanswer。Hisfeatureswerenotnaturallyintendedtowearasmilingaspect，buthewasingeneralrathergiventoprofessionaljocosity。Hisstepwaselastic，andhisfacebetokenedinwardpleasantry，asheadvancedtoMr。Bumble，andshookhimcordiallybythehand。
‘Ihavetakenthemeasureofthetwowomenthatdiedlastnight，Mr。Bumble，’saidtheundertaker。
‘You'llmakeyourfortune，Mr。Sowerberry，’saidthebeadle，ashethrusthisthumbandforefingerintotheprofferedsnuff-boxoftheundertaker：whichwasaningeniouslittlemodelofapatentcoffin。‘Isayyou'llmakeyourfortune，Mr。Sowerberry，’repeatedMr。Bumble，tappingtheundertakerontheshoulder，inafriendlymanner，withhiscane。
‘Thinkso？’saidtheundertakerinatonewhichhalfadmittedandhalfdisputedtheprobabilityoftheevent。‘Thepricesallowedbytheboardareverysmall，Mr。Bumble。’
‘Soarethecoffins，’repliedthebeadle：withpreciselyasnearanapproachtoalaughasagreatofficialoughttoindulgein。
Mr。Sowerberrywasmuchtickledatthis：asofcourseheoughttobe；andlaughedalongtimewithoutcessation。‘Well，well，Mr。Bumble，’hesaidatlength，‘there'snodenyingthat，sincethenewsystemoffeedinghascomein，thecoffinsaresomethingnarrowerandmoreshallowthantheyusedtobe；butwemusthavesomeprofit，Mr。Bumble。Well-seasonedtimberisanexpensivearticle，sir；andalltheironhandlescome，byc****，fromBirmingham。’
‘Well，well，’saidMr。Bumble，‘everytradehasitsdrawbacks。Afairprofitis，ofcourse，allowable。’
‘Ofcourse，ofcourse，’repliedtheundertaker；‘andifIdon'tgetaprofituponthisorthatparticulararticle，why，Imakeitupinthelong-run，yousee--he！he！he！’
‘Justso，’saidMr。Bumble。
‘ThoughImustsay，’continuedtheundertaker，resumingthecurrentofobservationswhichthebeadlehadinterrupted：‘thoughImustsay，Mr。Bumble，thatIhavetocontendagainstoneverygreatdisadvantage：whichis，thatallthestoutpeoplegooffthequickest。Thepeoplewhohavebeenbetteroff，andhavepaidratesformanyyears，arethefirsttosinkwhentheycomeintothehouse；andletmetellyou，Mr。Bumble，thatthreeorfourinchesoverone'scalculationmakesagreatholeinone'sprofits：especiallywhenonehasafamilytoprovidefor，sir。’
AsMr。Sowerberrysaidthis，withthebecomingindignationofanill-usedman；andasMr。Bumblefeltthatitrathertendedtoconveyareflectiononthehonouroftheparish；thelattergentlemanthoughtitadvisabletochangethesubject。OliverTwistbeinguppermostinhismind，hemadehimhistheme。
‘Bythebye，’saidMr。Bumble，‘youdon'tknowanybodywhowantsaboy，doyou？Aporochial’prentis，whoisatpresentadead-weight；amillstone，asImaysay，roundtheporochialthroat？Liberalterms，Mr。Sowerberry，liberalterms？‘AsMr。Bumblespoke，heraisedhiscanetothebillabovehim，andgavethreedistinctrapsuponthewords’fivepounds‘：whichwereprintedthereoninRomancapitalsofgiganticsize。
‘Gadso！’saidtheundertaker：takingMr。Bumblebythegilt-edgedlappelofhisofficialcoat；‘that'sjusttheverythingIwantedtospeaktoyouabout。Youknow--dearme，whataveryelegantbuttonthisis，Mr。Bumble！Inevernoticeditbefore。’
‘Yes，Ithinkitratherpretty，’saidthebeadle，glancingproudlydownwardsatthelargebrassbuttonswhichembellishedhiscoat。‘Thedieisthesameastheporochialseal--theGoodSamaritanhealingthesickandbruisedman。TheboardpresentedittomeonNewyear'smorning，Mr。Sowerberry。Iputiton，Iremember，forthefirsttime，toattendtheinquestonthatreducedtradesman，whodiedinadoorwayatmidnight。’
‘Irecollect，’saidtheundertaker。‘Thejurybroughtitin，“Diedfromexposuretothecold，andwantofthecommonnecessariesoflife，”didn'tthey？’
Mr。Bumblenodded。
‘Andtheymadeitaspecialverdict，Ithink，’saidtheundertaker，‘byaddingsomewordstotheeffect，thatiftherelievingofficerhad--’
‘Tush！Foolery！’interposedthebeadle。‘Iftheboardattendedtoallthenonsensethatignorantjurymentalk，they'dhaveenoughtodo。’
‘Verytrue，’saidtheundertaker；‘theywouldindeed。’
‘Juries，’saidMr。Bumble，graspinghiscanetightly，aswashiswontwhenworkingintoapassion：‘juriesisineddicated，vulgar，grovellingwretches。’
‘Sotheyare，’saidtheundertaker。
‘Theyhaven'tnomorephilosophynorpoliticaleconomyabout’emthanthat，‘saidthebeadle，snappinghisfingerscontemptuously。
‘Nomoretheyhave，’acquiescedtheundertaker。
‘Idespise’em，‘saidthebeadle，growingveryredintheface。
‘SodoI，’rejoinedtheundertaker。
‘AndIonlywishwe'dajuryoftheindependentsort，inthehouseforaweekortwo，’saidthebeadle；‘therulesandregulationsoftheboardwouldsoonbringtheirspiritdownfor’em。‘
‘Let’emaloneforthat，‘repliedtheundertaker。Sosaying，hesmiled，approvingly：tocalmtherisingwrathoftheindignantparishofficer。
MrBumbleliftedoffhiscockedhat；tookahandkerchieffromtheinsideofthecrown；wipedfromhisforeheadtheperspirationwhichhisragehadengendered；fixedthecockedhatonagain；and，turningtotheundertaker，saidinacalmervoice：
‘Well；whatabouttheboy？’
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