Chapter 23（1 / 2）

天才一秒记住【阅读阁】地址：yueduge.cc

WHICHCONTAINSTHESUBSTANCEOFAPLEASANTCONVERSATIONBETWEENMR。BUMBLEANDALADY；ANDSHOWSTHATEVENABEADLEMAYBESUSCEPTIBLEONSOMEPOINTS

Thenightwasbittercold。Thesnowlayontheground，frozenintoahardthickcrust，sothatonlytheheapsthathaddriftedintobywaysandcornerswereaffectedbythesharpwindthathowledabroad：which，asifexpendingincreasedfuryonsuchpreyasitfound，caughtitsavagelyupinclouds，and，whirlingitintoathousandmistyeddies，scattereditinair。Bleak，dark，andpiercingcold，itwasanightforthewell-housedandfedtodrawroundthebrightfireandthankGodtheywereathome；andforthehomeless，starvingwretchtolayhimdownanddie。Manyhunger-wornoutcastsclosetheireyesinourbarestreets，atsuchtimes，who，lettheircrimeshavebeenwhattheymay，canhardlyopentheminamorebitterworld。

Suchwastheaspectofout-of-doorsaffairs，whenMrs。Corney，thematronoftheworkhousetowhichourreadershavebeenalreadyintroducedasthebirthplaceofOliverTwist，satherselfdownbeforeacheerfulfireinherownlittleroom，andglanced，withnosmalldegreeofcomplacency，atasmallroundtable：onwhichstoodatrayofcorrespondingsize，furnishedwithallnecessarymaterialsforthemostgratefulmealthatmatronsenjoy。Infact，Mrs。Corneywasabouttosolaceherselfwithacupoftea。Assheglancedfromthetabletothefireplace，wherethesmallestofallpossiblekettleswassingingasmallsonginasmallvoice，herinwardsatisfactionevidentlyincreased，--somuchso，indeed，thatMrs。Corneysmiled。

‘Well！’saidthematron，leaningherelbowonthetable，andlookingreflectivelyatthefire；‘I'msurewehaveallonusagreatdealtobegratefulfor！Agreatdeal，ifwedidbutknowit。Ah！’

Mrs。Corneyshookherheadmournfully，asifdeploringthementalblindnessofthosepauperswhodidnotknowit；andthrustingasilverspoon（privateproperty）intotheinmostrecessesofatwo-ouncetintea-caddy，proceededtomakethetea。

Howslightathingwilldisturbtheequanimityofourfrailminds！Theblackteapot，beingverysmallandeasilyfilled，ranoverwhileMrs。Corneywasmoralising；andthewaterslightlyscaldedMrs。Corney'shand。

‘Dratthepot！’saidtheworthymatron，settingitdownveryhastilyonthehob；‘alittlestupidthing，thatonlyholdsacoupleofcups！Whatuseisitof，toanybody！Except，’saidMrs。Corney，pausing，‘excepttoapoordesolatecreaturelikeme。Ohdear！’

Withthesewords，thematrondroppedintoherchair，and，oncemorerestingherelbowonthetable，thoughtofhersolitaryfate。Thesmallteapot，andthesinglecup，hadawakenedinhermindsadrecollectionsofMr。Corney（whohadnotbeendeadmorethanfive-and-twentyyears）；andshewasoverpowered。

‘Ishallnevergetanother！’saidMrs。Corney，pettishly；‘Ishallnevergetanother--likehim。’

Whetherthisremarkborereferencetothehusband，ortheteapot，isuncertain。Itmighthavebeenthelatter；forMrs。Corneylookedatitasshespoke；andtookitupafterwards。Shehadjusttastedherfirstcup，whenshewasdisturbedbyasofttapattheroom-door。

‘Oh，comeinwithyou！’saidMrs。Corney，sharply。‘Someoftheoldwomendying，Isuppose。TheyalwaysdiewhenI'matmeals。Don'tstandthere，lettingthecoldairin，don't。What'samissnow，eh？’

‘Nothing，ma'am，nothing，’repliedaman'svoice。

‘Dearme！’exclaimedthematron，inamuchsweetertone，‘isthatMr。Bumble？’

‘Atyourservice，ma'am，’saidMr。Bumble，whohadbeenstoppingoutsidetorubhisshoesclean，andtoshakethesnowoffhiscoat；andwhonowmadehisappearance，bearingthecockedhatinonehandandabundleintheother。‘ShallIshutthedoor，ma'am？’

Theladymodestlyhesitatedtoreply，lestthereshouldbeanyimproprietyinholdinganinterviewwithMr。Bumble，withcloseddoors。Mr。Bumbletakingadvantageofthehesitation，andbeingverycoldhimself，shutitwithoutpermission。

‘Hardweather，Mr。Bumble，’saidthematron。

‘Hard，indeed，ma'am，’repliedthebeadle。‘Anti-porochialweatherthis，ma'am。Wehavegivenaway，Mrs。Corney，wehavegivenawayamatteroftwentyquarternloavesandacheeseandahalf，thisveryblessedafternoon；andyetthempaupersarenotcontented。’

‘Ofcoursenot。Whenwouldtheybe，Mr。Bumble？’saidthematron，sippinghertea。

‘When，indeed，ma'am！’rejoinedMr。Bumble。‘Whyhere'sonemanthat，inconsiderationofhiswifeandlargefamily，hasaquarternloafandagoodpoundofcheese，fullweight。Ishegrateful，ma'am？Ishegrateful？Notacopperfarthing'sworthofit！Whatdoeshedo，ma'am，butaskforafewcoals；ifit'sonlyapockethandkerchieffull，hesays！Coals！Whatwouldhedowithcoals？Toasthischeesewith’emandthencomebackformore。That'sthewaywiththesepeople，ma'am；give‘emaapronfullofcoalsto-day，andthey'llcomebackforanother，thedayafterto-morrow，asbrazenasalabaster。’

Thematronexpressedherentireconcurrenceinthisintelligiblesimile；andthebeadlewenton。

‘Inever，’saidMr。Bumble，‘seeanythinglikethepitchit'sgotto。Thedayaforeyesterday，aman--youhavebeenamarriedwoman，ma'am，andImaymentionittoyou--aman，withhardlyaraguponhisback（hereMrs。Corneylookedatthefloor），goestoouroverseer'sdoorwhenhehasgotcompanycomingtodinner；andsays，hemustberelieved，Mrs。Corney。Ashewouldn'tgoaway，andshockedthecompanyverymuch，ouroverseersenthimoutapoundofpotatoesandhalfapintofoatmeal。“Myheart！”saystheungratefulvillain，“what'stheuseof_this_tome？Youmightaswellgivemeapairofironspectacles！”“Verygood，”saysouroverseer，taking’emawayagain，“youwon'tgetanythingelsehere。”“ThenI'lldieinthestreets！”saysthevagrant。“Ohno，youwon't，”saysouroverseer。‘

‘Ha！ha！Thatwasverygood！SolikeMr。Grannett，wasn'tit？’interposedthematron。‘Well，Mr。Bumble？’

‘Well，ma'am，’rejoinedthebeadle，‘hewentaway；andhe_did_dieinthestreets。There'saobstinatepauperforyou！’

‘ItbeatsanythingIcouldhavebelieved，’observedthematronemphatically。‘Butdon'tyouthinkout-of-doorreliefaverybadthing，anyway，Mr。Bumble？You'reagentlemanofexperience，andoughttoknow。Come。’

‘Mrs。Corney，’saidthebeadle，smilingasmensmilewhoareconsciousofsuperiorinformation，‘out-of-doorrelief，properlymanaged：properlymanaged，ma'am：istheporochialsafeguard。Thegreatprincipleofout-of-doorreliefis，togivethepaupersexactlywhattheydon'twant；andthentheygettiredofcoming。’

‘Dearme！’exclaimedMrs。Corney。‘Well，thatisagoodone，too！’

‘Yes。Betwixtyouandme，ma'am，’returnedMr。Bumble，‘that'sthegreatprinciple；andthat'sthereasonwhy，ifyoulookatanycasesthatgetintothemowdaciousnewspapers，you'llalwaysobservethatsickfamilieshavebeenrelievedwithslicesofcheese。That'stherulenow，Mrs。Corney，alloverthecountry。But，however，’saidthebeadle，stoppingtounpackhisbundle，‘theseareofficialsecrets，ma'am；nottobespokenof；except，asImaysay，amongtheporochialofficers，suchasourselves。Thisistheportwine，ma'am，thattheboardorderedfortheinfirmary；real，fresh，genuineportwine；onlyoutofthecaskthisforenoon；clearasabell，andnosediment！’